Random Thoughts

It was getting dark in the evening and she still hadn’t been able to sell a single pack of cigarettes. Usually she woke up early in the morning and started selling, since she used to sleep on the pavement and it was very difficult for her to shield her eyes from the bright sunlight when morning came. Today, however, she had slept a little extra, since she was not feeling well. Actually she hadn’t had anything to eat yesterday and so she was having pain in her abdomen. Not that it was any rare incident, however. She had gone quite used to this ever since her mother had died on a cold winter night. But Muniya didn’t like to think about that night. That was so frightening, with so many people just starting at her and her dead mother. She had more things to worry today. Her brother had been crying since morning as he also hadn’t got anything to eat since yesterday. Only now he had gone to sleep, either probably because his hunger had been satiated somehow, or he had gone too weak to cry. There was a small crowd in front of a large building which they called PVR, and she felt this might be her only chance to sell something and buy some food for both of them. With whatever strength was left of her, she lifted the big box on which she used to keep cigarette packs, left her brother sleeping on the ground, and moved towards the crowd.

Swati was very happy today. Her fiancé had just returned from US, and they both had come to PVR to buy the latest blockbuster movie of Amir Khan. She had wanted to get tickets for the show of 9 o’clock since it was very hot even at 6 in the evening in June. But the movie was a blockbuster, and all the tickets were booked. Even these tickets were arranged after she had paid twice the fair amount to a guy selling them in black market. The tickets were definitely expensive, and Swati was feeling a little guilty over them. But what the hell, she thought. Her fiancé was earning a handsome salary and definitely 500 more bucks in Indian rupees wouldn’t have mattered much to him. They were standing in the queue, and with nothing to do, she was idly chatting with him about what to do with the wedding gifts she would receive.

But their talk was interrupted when suddenly a small girl, with a big box in her hands, came out of nowhere and stood beside her fiancé, asking him to buy some cigarettes. He refused, for he had just bought a full pack few minutes ago. But that girl didn’t move, and just stood there as if she didn’t know where else to go. Finally he ignored her and turned to Swati to continue the talk he was having with her.

But Swati’s eyes were fixated on that little girl. Malnutrition was painfully obvious on her small face and petite body. Her dry lips were telling that she hadn’t had anything to eat, or drink, for a very long time. Not that she wasn’t cute, however. She would have looked very beautiful had her clothes been not so ragged and there was a little bit of oil in her hair, Swati thought. Suddenly Swati felt a very strong urge of buying the cigarettes, even though she didn’t smoke herself, so that the little girl would get some money. She thought of taking some money from her purse and giving that to the girl, but then thought that her fiancé may get annoyed and so decided against it.

And she never knew why, but suddenly at that very instant, a young guy flashed in her mind. She had met Tejas a few years ago while she used to work in Cannaught Place. He was tall, dark and had thin hands that she didn’t like. He wasn’t that smart, but he wasn’t bad, either. They used to share so many qualities that it used to amaze them at times. They both liked chocolate truffles, and loved cracking jokes on each other. They both liked to wear blue, and kept long dark hair. In fact, in those days once she had almost decided to dye her hair, but didn’t go for it when she knew that he didn’t like it. Of course, she never told him that. And that, perhaps, was the biggest irony. They both liked each other so much, but didn’t have the courage to say this to the other one. He had gone to study MBA, and she left for US to complete her studies. They had planned to meet somewhere in Europe, but as fate would have had it, that incident never happened.

He used to get very emotional over little girls who used to roam around in the streets and had nowhere to go. He wanted to open a school for them in his home town. She, on the other hand, wanted to do something for the street children in Delhi. (This was another point where they agreed with each other. They had planned that they would help each other in their social work when they both would start earning).

But why was she thinking of him at this time? She didn’t know. Maybe because that little girl had suddenly reminded her of the pledge she had taken with him to help street children, and had slowly forgotten in her rush to make it big in the corporate world. Suddenly, she felt a very strong urge to rush back to her home, open her old address books, find out where his friend was staying now, and if he was still unmarried, marry him. It wouldn’t be for her own happiness. Her fiancé was a very wonderful man, her perfect partner – she was in no doubt about that. It wouldn’t be for Tejas, either, because she was sure he would have met many better girls over the years. It would be for that little girl who was standing before her now. It would be for a small boy selling steplars at a traffic signal. It would be for that old woman who used to sit in the subway with a plastic cup in front of her. And it would be for those countless little children who were roaming around at that moment of time in Tejas’ home town.

For both Tejas and Swati, it wouldn’t be for their lives, it would be for their dreams.

Swati and her fiancé had reached the end of the queue. Just before entering the movie hall, she cast a last glance at the girl, who she never knew and perhaps never will, but who seemed closer to her than the entire world right now.

P.S.: this is the first story I have written. it may not be that good, but i do hope to get better with time.